What is it that you do, anyway?

Yesterday, a woman at church asked me, "So, what is it that you do?" She wanted to know how I had made my contacts at Voorhees Twp. Funny thing is I have no idea how the contacts were made. Sure, phone calls were made, cards exchanged, but I made no concerted effort to get to know these people. I fear that sounds arrogant. Allow me to clarify.

I'm not trying to make friends. I'm not trying to move ahead in ministry or in any area of my life. Right now, I'm giving God the freedsom to do as He pleases in my life. I wake up in the morning ready to do whatever it is that He has planned for my day. If that involves talking to the zoning official in Voorhees, great. If that involves talking to a faceless, nameless, homeless person in Philadelphia, even better. I'm simply trying to be His hands, His smile, His voice.

Heck, I'm even learning to say no. Or even better, not to say yes. That may seem elementary to some. In the past, whenever I've seen a need, I've jumped to fill it. I've always wanted to please people around me, people in leadership. I've always identified myself with the verbs rather than with who I am. I learned from those mistakes and now I'm comfortable being who I am...that means only saying yes to those things that I know God wants me to do, and not all of the other stuff. What I've learned is that God has someone to do everything...all of the tasks at hand. That person may not be in the room at the moment, but that person is available. My knee-jerk reaction is to fill the need. God's desire is that we all fill the needs.

I was tempted to delete my previous blog. I've avoided that temptation. This blog, for me, at the moment, is about chronicling a journey, not about me shouting from the mountaintops how amazing my life is. It's about being real, and watching what God does, how God takes me from the mountaintop to the pit of despair and up out of the miry pit. The feelings that I am experiencing are very real. However, I am not called to live by feeling but by faith. Being picked up out of the pit is faith...because sometimes it feels good to wallow. But walking with Jesus involves shaking the dust off your boots and walking forth.